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So English, I fancy you all agree, is the funniest language you ever did see.
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English might be the most widespread language in the
world but there’s still no ham in hamburger, no egg in eggplant and
neither pine nor apple in pineapple.
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The thing you’re looking for is always found in the last place you look.
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What did the man who walked into a bar say? Ouch!
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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake.
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What are two things people never eat before breakfast? Lunch and dinner.
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Why is the number six so scared? Because seven eight nine!
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If the plural of man is always called men, why shouldn’t the plural of pan be called pen?
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If we are the human race, then who is winning?
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If vegetarians eat vegetables then what on earth do humanitarians eat?!
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Some writing tips:
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Exaggeration is a trillion times worse than understatement.
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Rhetorical questions, who needs them?
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When writing in English, contractions shouldn’t be used.
- Stop using exclamation marks!!!
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